Tag Archive - quit

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Why it’s Good for Ministry to be Difficult

Over the last couple of decades of full-time local church ministry, I’ve seen my fair share of difficult ministry moments. Like many of you I’ve experienced incredible wins and painful setbacks.

Anyone who’s been in local church ministry for more than 5 minutes knows that it’s not always rainbows and unicorns. Ministry can have incredibly difficult seasons and sometimes we can face what seems like insurmountable obstacles.

And that’s good…

Difficulties often force us to take a Different Direction:

When things become difficult in ministry sometimes the right thing to do is to push through and give more effort. But sometimes difficulties provide an opportunity to take a different approach and get different results. Either way, the best way to silence your critics is not to shout or fight back but to simply keep going and prove them wrong. So if you have to give more effort or take a different approach, either way, keep going!

Difficulties provide a Mirror for our Leadership:

When the lights come on and the whistle blows, and the game clock begins to tick it’s too late to practice and perfect your craft. Difficulties are a gauge for us to measure how we’re growing as a leader. Difficulties reveal our leadership capacity and effectiveness.

Difficulties help us Develop a Greater Capacity:

Often times you don’t know you can, until you do. One more mile, one more rep…one more. Everyone knows that overworking can lead to all kinds of unhealth and ultimately kill you. But people have a tendency to forget that underwork can lead to all kinds of unhealth and kill you just the same. Life change isn’t easy. The cross wasn’t easy. Difficulty is good for church leaders because it helps us develop our leadership muscle, mental toughness, and remind us to rely on the One we’re doing all of this for. Don’t give up just because it’s difficult. God can do more in you and through you than you think He can.


Posted in Leadership

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Why the Church isn’t to Blame for Ministry Burnout

A quick Google search for “ministry burnout” will reveal a long list of articles that include bleak statistics and multiple lists that will help people in ministry avoid burnout.

While most perspectives out there are set to vilify the church for causing ministry burnout I’d like to throw out a less popular option to consider. I understand some will consider this harsh, but I’d encourage you to really think this next statement through before you dismiss it.

“Ministry burnout is self-induced.”

  • No one is responsible for how you spend your time but you
  • No one is responsible for the depth of your friendship with Jesus but you
  • No one is responsible for the rhythm of your rest and work but you
  • No one is responsible for how you respond to pressure but you
  • No one is responsible for how lonely you feel but you
  • No one is responsible to say “no” for you other than you

Taking personal responsibility for the health of your own soul and rhythm of your life may be the first and best step you can take to avoid ministry burnout.

Interested in learning more about Ministry Burnout? Check out these helpful articles:

  1. Soul Care and the Leader
  2. Heading Towards Burnout Part-1
  3. Heading Towards Burnout Part-2
  4. What your Pastor isn’t Telling You

Posted in Leadership, Spiritual Formation

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Top Posts of 2012 #3: What Your Pastor Isn’t Telling You

This post checks in at #3 this year. I say ‘this year’ because I originally wrote this post back in 2011 and it has been in the top five read posts for the past 2 years. Apparently is struck a nerve.

 


 

Most Lead Pastors come off as having it all under control. Never let ‘em see you sweat right? Nothing could be further from the truth. More often than not it’s more like the proverbial duck that on top of the water looks calm, cool, and collected; all the while under the water his little feet are frantically paddling for dear life. If you’ve never been a Lead Pastor before let me take a moment to help you understand what it’s like to live in their shoes and what often times is going on in their heart. My hope is that you’ll remember these truths the next time you get frustrated and are tempted to become critical of your Lead Pastor. And instead of pouring salt in a wound you’ll be the kind of Staff Member or Church Member who holds your Lead Pastor’s arms up and lightens their load.

1. Your Pastor Feels Overwhelmed by Criticism

People complain about the volume of the music, what I’m wearing, the temperature of the room, that you didn’t visit them in the hospital, that you don’t read from the right version of the Bible, that you’re not deep enough (although they don’t even know the names of their neighbors), that you’re too deep, that I’m in the green room instead of the lobby, that while I’m in the lobby I didn’t say hi to them, that I didn’t remember their name even though I’ve only met them once never hung out with them and have 3,000 other names to know. People complain about other areas of ministry in the Church to them, and even if they handle this well and direct them to see the appropriate Staff Member, it creates a burden for them to carry. I’ve even heard friends of mine who are Pastors talk about having to have security guards follow them around for periods of time due to threats to them and their families. Or I love it when people say now Pastor this isn’t personal BUT…we think if you just did…fill in the blank (it’s not personal but?!!?!?!?). Okay, that might have been a bit of a rant.

2. Your Pastor Feels Pressure from Everywhere

Everybody seems to have expectations for Pastors to live up to and amazingly somehow know God’s will for their Pastor’s life and the Church they’re leading. The Church Body has theirs; the Staff has theirs, the Elders, Deacons or whatever the governance structure is or who the decision makers happen to be have theirs. It comes from all sides. As a result many Pastors I talk to feel as though they’re not only fighting the Enemy, but their fighting the Family as well.

3. Your Pastor Frequently Feels like Quitting

Take a moment to do a quick internet search on “pastor burnout” and the results might shock you. You’ll find pages and pages of articles, statistics, and stories of literally hundreds of men leaving the ministry every single day. Just take a quick look below:

  • CNNMoney.com posted an article listing 15 “Stressful Jobs That Pay Badly.” Included in this list are #5 “Music Ministry Director” and #10 “Minister.”
  • Fifteen hundred pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, spiritual burnout or contention in their churches.
  • Eighty percent of pastors and eighty-four percent of their spouses feel unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors.
  • Fifty percent of pastors are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way of making a living.

I’ve had conversations with Pastors from small churches, mega-churches, multi-site churches, church plants, established churches, contemporary churches, and traditional churches. Somewhere along the road they feel like giving up, some of them have thought about it so much that they even have a fallback plan. Over and over again I’ve heard the statement, “There isn’t a month that goes by that I don’t think about resigning.”

4. Your Pastor is often Confused about the Next Steps the Church should take

Your Church may have a clearly articulated Mission Statement, Values that are actionable, and a clear path and strategy to move people towards maturity but many Pastors still struggle with what next steps the Church should take. I’ve heard Pastor’s say:

“When my office door is closed and no one’s around I often feel confused about what’s next.”

“If God doesn’t show up we’re in trouble because I don’t know what to do next.”

“Here I am at the point of this thing and all of these people are looking to me for where we’re going and there are real moments when I feel like I have no clue where we’re going.”


Posted in Leadership, Staffing

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Soul Care and the Leader

We’ve all heard the statistics. And what the statistics are telling us is that beneath the surface of appearances, a majority of pastors are hurting and discouraged. Do a quick Google search on “pastor burnout” and you’ll easily find the following statistics and more!

• 1,500 pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, spiritual burnout or contention in their churches.

• 80% of pastors and 84% of their spouses feel unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors.

• 50% of pastors are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way of making a living.

Great, so that’s reality. Really encouraging right? So what are Pastors to do about it?

1. Learn to say “No”

Believe it or not “no” can be a complete sentence. The Church already has a Savior and He’s doing quite well. Jesus already died for the Church, you don’t need to!

2. Learn what “Fuels Me”

You’ve got to discover what fuels you and then do that. Whether it is recreational or spiritual (it can be both) you’ve got to take the time to understand your own soul. One of the reasons there are so many spiritual disciplines is because there are so many different personalities and styles. Don’t do what works for somebody else. Do what works for you!

3. Protect Each Other

Life is best lived in community. In fact life-change happens best in the context of relationship. That’s not just a cliché we use to get people into small groups. Who are you doing life with? Who knows you? Who are you intentionally opening your soul to? Who is protecting you, and who are you protecting?

4. Control your own schedule

Time is simply an asset to leverage in order to get you where you want to go. Use it how you want to, so you can get where you want to. Intentionally schedule time with your family, vacation, time to evaluate, personal retreat days, etc. If you don’t control your calendar, everyone else will.

What have you found helpful in avoiding burnout in ministry? Leave a comment!


Posted in Leadership, Spiritual Formation, Staffing

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Top 5 Posts of 2011 #1: what your pastor isn’t telling you

And finally here it is. Coming in as the #1 post of 2011, and honestly friends this one wasn’t even close, “What Your Pastor isn’t Telling You.” This post won running away. After sitting on both sides of the desk as both an Executive Pastor and Lead Pastor of a couple of different mega-churches this post provides unique insight into the untold world of your Lead Pastor.

What your Pastor isn’t Telling You

Most Lead Pastors come off as having it all under control. Never let ‘em see you sweat right? Nothing could be further from the truth. More often than not it’s more like the proverbial duck that on top of the water looks calm, cool, and collected; all the while under the water his little feet are frantically paddling for dear life. If you’ve never been a Lead Pastor before let me take a moment to help you understand what it’s like to live in their shoes and what often times is going on in their heart. My hope is that you’ll remember these truths the next time you get frustrated and are tempted to become critical of your Lead Pastor. And instead of pouring salt in a wound you’ll be the kind of Staff Member or Church Member who holds your Lead Pastor’s arms up and lightens their load.

Continue Reading…


Posted in Leadership, Staffing
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