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leadership lessons i was reminded of on vacation

Camping

This past week I took some time off to come up for air and hang with the kids while they were on their fall break. We had a great time watching movies, wrestling, playing games, doing yard work (yes I love doing yard work), sleeping in, having fires, fishing, hiking and camping (yes for real tent camping). Below are a couple of leadership lessons I was reminded of while I was relaxing with the family!

A Change of Scenery can Change Your Perspective

It was great getting out of the desert for a bit and hanging out in the trees up at Woods Canyon Lake! It’s funny how many times we forget this simple lesson as leaders but it’s essential to remain healthy and creative as a leader to put ourselves in different environments to keep us looking at things from a fresh perspective.

Enjoy the Journey

It was eerie being woken up in the middle of the night by the sound of elk bugling in the distance (they sound like whales). But that morning when I came out of the tent to get the fire going I was met by 3 elk about 50 yards from our tent. I quickly got the kids out of the tent and we just sat there taking it in for a few minutes before breakfast. If you can’t enjoy the scenery along the journey, you’ll never enjoy the destination once you get there (if you do).

The Right Work can be Refreshing and Gratifying

I know it’s weird, but I love doing yard work. I got to trim the pygmy date palms, overseed the yard and get rid of the weeds in the decomposed granite (all of my friends in the desert understand). When you’re playing the role on the team that you were created for all of the sudden your work becomes satisfying, refreshing, and meaningful.

Always have a Plan-B (and C, D, E, & F)

We ended up leaving the campground a day early due to the weather report; I actually had 1 bar (big shout out to Verizon). Good thing we did because our friends who stayed up there in a RV said they woke up to hail and ice on the ground. Sometimes as a leader you’ve got to know when to go to plan-B, be flexible, and sometimes even call it quits.


Posted in Family, Leadership

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big news in the alexander house

I am thrilled to be able to announce that Lisa and I are getting ready to welcome our fourth child into the Alexander family. We are pregnant! I’ve always thought it was funny that guys say, “We are pregnant!” This will be number four for us, one more and we can field our own basketball team! That’s not the goal by the way. The girls are ready to practice all of their “mommy skills” and Lincoln is hoping for a baby brother to train up in the ways of the force. Lisa and I are just thrilled that the Lord would trust us of all people with another child! We’d appreciate all of your prayers as we begin this new part the journey as a family.


Posted in Family

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3 lessons i’ve learned from 16 years of marriage

weddingcoupleholdinghands

I can’t believe Lisa and I just celebrated 16 years of marriage! It feels like everything is going in fast forward these days! The relationship is getting richer and I’m learning to soak up incredible moments that I would have skimmed over just a few years ago. While I could write out a grocery list of the things I’ve learned through the years, here are the three that are at the forefront currently:

1. When you love someone, you love what he or she loves

In the book of Philippians the Apostle Paul puts it this way: “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” As we mature in our relationship with Christ and our spouse that maturity drives us towards love and love is the opposite of self-centeredness. Marriage simply isn’t about us, and the deeper that truth sinks in the better our marriage becomes.

2. The depth of love in a relationship shows up in the subtleties

Anybody can plan big the moments and save up and drop a lot of dough on a special occasion. But it’s the everyday glances, touches, words, tone, body language and subtleties that set the temperature of a marriage. Do the small stuff everyday.

3. The Principle of Compounding Interest

Nobody’s marriage falls apart overnight. Just like no one builds a great marriage overnight. It takes a commitment to consistent behavior demonstrated over an extended period of time. To rip off a line from Denzel Washington in Remember the Titans, “It’s like Novocain, just give it time, it always works.” The payoff comes from consistently doing the right thing everyday.

 Interested in more tips on marriage and learning from my mistakes? Check out 14 Lessons from 14 Years of Marriage


Posted in Family

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managing the tension between marriage and ministry part-2

coupleboxing

Some time ago we set aside a Staff Training Day at Sun Valley Community Church and invited a couple of area churches together to invest in our Staff and their spouses. If you haven’t noticed lately the statistics are telling us that leaders in ministry are checking out every day on their families and their ministry. Any quick Google Search on “Pastors leaving Ministry” will give you loads of information and statistics on the subject. I managed to grab the .mp3 files of a couple of talks for you from that day. Here they are for FREE! If you missed the first two sessions I posted the other day you can get them here

Session #3
A panel discussion of seasoned ministry leaders and their spouses, regarding marriage and ministry.
Scott Ridout, Tom Shrader, Lee Wiggins, Randy Deal, Justin Anderson

Download the third session (right click and “save as…”)

Session #4
Chad Moore, Lead Pastor of Sun Valley Community Church
The story of his wife’s affair and the journey towards reconciliation and healing.

Download the fourth session (right click and “save as…”)

 


Posted in Family, Leadership

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managing the tension between marriage and ministry part-1

coupleboxing

Some time ago we set aside a Staff Training Day at Sun Valley Community Church and invited a couple of area churches together to invest in our Staff and their spouses. If you haven’t noticed lately the statistics are telling us that leaders in ministry are checking out every day on their families and their ministry. Any quick Google Search on “Pastors leaving Ministry” will give you loads of information and statistics on the subject. I managed to grab the .mp3 files of a couple of talks for you from that day. Here they are for FREE!

Session #1
Tom Shrader, Founding and Lead Teaching Pastor of Redemption Church
Recently lost his wife to cancer.

Download the first session (right click and “save as…”)

Session #2
Al Ells, Founder and Director of Leaders that Last
An interview with Al who serves as a professional counselor, coach, and mentor to many high level leaders.

Download the second session (right click and “save as…”)


Posted in Family, Leadership
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